Tuesday, May 29, 2012

Awkward and Awesomeness

Yes,  I'm still here.  We took a small hiatus due to the fact that all my favorite places around the Internet were blocked at work last week.  Boo.  Thus, once I got home, their is absolutely no time to peruse and present you with a pretty little package of a blog post.  And besides that....
No, just kidding.  I have been processing through some deep and heavy stuff as of lately, and am not quite ready to share here.  You can obviously understand....privacy and junk. Well, lets get to it shall we?  I'm full, I mean full of aaawwwkward this week.

  • Going to the pool for the first time this summer, and having one sweet child of mine pull my green strapless suit down to flash one very white, not so attractive breast.
  • Sam pooped in the tub.  Hilarious, yes....Gross, heck yes!
  • You know that moment in a one-on-one conversation when you just feel like you want to fleet?  As fast as you can?  Like get in your car and leave?  Yep, that happened this week.
  • A student asked come see him rap in a show.  I, of course, say yes!  Mr. N insisted I bring a partner in crime, and I just couldn't understand why.  I can handle myself!  Well, needless to say, I'm so very glad I did.  Not only was I the only female in the joint that happened to be Caucasian, the only blonde, the only person wearing pants that weren't painted on, and the only person over the age of 25.  I stuck out.  Horribly.  There was at least ten cops, we were searched before going in, there was more drugs than Walgreens, and Walgreens doesn't carry those kind of drugs.  At one point, my partner in crime got a beer spilled all over his beautiful bald head.  He had that look like, "I'm beat the crap out of that dude."  I proceeded to take my styling green blazer off and dry off his head.   We both went home and took a very hot shower.
  • Seeing a young woman wear a pair of hipster briefs, a bustier and the most hooker shoes I've ever seen, (which is saying a lot, because I used to be a social worker helping prostitutes) as an outfit, in public.
  • Ben said to me, "I don't want to trade Sam for anything else.  Not even Jesus."
  • Ben also said, "Sammy is the cutest, most handsomest, most kindest, funniest baby ever!" (Then he also proceeded to fake burp all day, so don't worry, he's totally a boy.)
  • Pre-made frozen margaritas that like to live in my freezer until I decide they need to live in my belly.
  • I trimmed baby Sam's bangs, because he was totally Beiber.  Then once I trimmed the front, he had a mullet, so I continued in the back.  It looked pretty legit.  Go me.
  • Mr. N has been applying for the "Best Parent Ever" over at our house.  I think he'll win.
Have a awesome day my lovelies.....hugs, A

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