Monday, August 27, 2012

This Moment



My baby is in kindergarden. I truly can't believe this moment is here. This situation feels so very heavy to me for some reason.  As the first school day crept up on me, I felt it was really no big deal, because he's been in school/daycare his entire life.  But now, he is REALLY in school.

Yes, I know I'm being dramatic, but I almost feel like this is the beginning to the end. And, yes, I know this is crazy for me to think this.  But I do.  The lump in my throat grows until I tear up.

If I could pause this time, I would. When I see his little face, I see a big kid, no longer my little boy. As crazy as this is, I feel I can just see his entire life ahead of him.  All the hurts, happiness, decisions, learning, loving, and growing....just rolled out ahead of his little feet.

He makes me want to be the very best person I can be.  He makes me want to love everything as hard as I can.  Ben, you are my happy thoughts.  Thank you.

Today I will just breathe him in, his sweet breath and tight hugs.  I will make this moment count for everything it is.  I can never get it back again. 

Love and teary eyes, A

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